My new little buddy (more than likely it’s buddies) have not been enticed in the slightest by the sweet aroma of stale peanut butter on a spring loaded dinner plate.

According to reliable sources (as reliable as the internet is) I may have a shy mouse. My brother, on the other hand, suggested that I may have a rejected and depressed mouse. Either way, it appears the mouse has severe emotional problems, and in my opinion should be put out of his misery.

The shy mouse syndrome

According to this train of thought, I need to allow the mouse to become familiar with the mouse trap. The suggestion is, to leave the trap un-set, with no bait for a week in the one of the mouse’s favourite haunts. After a week, I should put a little bait on the trap, but still leave it un-set, so that the mouse can become familiar with the trap. Then, a few days later, I go in for the kill.

The fact is, I want the little bastard(s) dead now. Not tomorrow. Definitely not after the mouse has worked his way through the twelve step program for shyness. “Hello – my name is Mickey, and I’m a shy mouse”

Sheesh! (remember Pixie and Dixie and Mr Jinx the cat? Mr Jinx sheeshed a lot)

The rejection mouse theory

Now, this is my brother’s theory, so take that into consideration (read more about his mouse ideology). He suggests I make little tiny peanut butter sandwiches, and invite the mouse for dinner. Over a glass of wine at the end of our meal, I should tell the little rodent that “it’s over” and he has to move on. I suppose I could go with the “It’s not you, it’s me” thing, but I doubt that even a mouse would fall for that old line.

I can see it now. The mouse will walk away, sobbing uncontrollably. He’ll look back at me and say something stupid like “Can I call you sometime?”

ARRGGGH!!!!

I will not deal with a mouse that needs therapy in a gentle and understanding way. I believe a mouse should face his demons head on (or more to the point head in – the trap that is) The world has gone crazy, and we need to return to the simple basics once again. Mice and people do not mix. End of story

And we all know that one mouse means more than one. So I guess that mice traps are on my shopping list tomorrow. Or a cat.

I had some of the furry little pests in the house when I first moved here. And about 5 years ago, all of Moose Jaw had a minor shrew problem. The shrews eat insects, so they are almost bearable – still not wanted in the house though.

Ironically, just last week Lois was telling me several little horror stories about mice. Is it possible just the power of suggestion brought this on? I think we’ll blame her this time. I’m glad she wasn’t talking about snakes or alligators.

Apparently, mice like pet food. If they have to eat Bandit’s food, I hope they eat the cheap stuff, not the prescription diet stuff I have been buying for his arthritis. Of course, the dog doesn’t like the good stuff, so it doesn’t matter to him. In fact, if they eat it all he will likely get people food, and that is all for the best as far as he’s concerned.

Another little fact I just learned (from the internet, of course) Mice are not native to North America. They are from Asia originally, and found their way to Canada and the USA with European settlers a few hundred years ago.

So what is the best mouse trap to buy? Anyone?